Alan Mays' photos with the keyword: advice

"Lecture, Fulton Hall, Thursday even'g, March 13, 1878. Rev. Dr. G. F. Krotel. Subject: 'Whom to Marry.' Express Print." Gottlob Frederick Krotel (1826-1907) was the pastor of the Holy Trinity Lutheran Church in Lancaster, Pennsylvania, from 1853 to 1862. As this ticket indicates, he returned to Lancaster on March 13, 1873, to deliver a lecture titled "Whom to Marry" at Fulton Hall , which is known today as the Fulton Opera House or Fulton Theatre. The Reading Times (Reading, Pa.) for Saturday, March 15, 1873, p. 4, noted that the lecture took place--"Rev. Dr. Krotel told the people of Lancaster 'Whom to Marry' on Thursday evening"--but didn't reveal any of his marriage advice.

"Advice to the Lovelorn. If he is bashful, I would advise you to give him plenty of encouragement. Put your arms around me–so! Oo-oo, I don't like ter! August Hutaf. P.C.K. 1908." One in a series of humorous "Advice to the Lovelorn" postcards by illustrator August Hutaf (1874-1942). For more of his work, see Advice to Vacationists–Take the Children with You (below) and my other Hutaf postcards .

"Fotograph your boy before the 4th of July: you may not get a chance after." Macabre photographic advice from an early twentieth-century postcard. For more dark humor about Fourth of July fireworks, see The Glorious 4th of July / The 5th of July :

This comic postcard, which was postmarked in Oswego, N.Y., on August 27, 1932, reveals that frustration with the complexity of income tax in the United States is nothing new. In fact, this amusing account of how to calculate your tax was circulating in magazines and newspapers as early as 1919. For one example, see " It's Easy ," published in the Santa Fe Magazine , August 1919, p. 58. Take My Advice–The Next Time You Make Out Your Income Tax Report It can be easily done by observing these simple rules. It may be worked out by algebra, astronomy, trigonometry, or syntax and then your answer may be correct or it may not be. If your income is $2,400.00 a year and [you have] a diamond ring or an automobile and you are married to a brunette girl, 26 years of age, you take the amount of the income and add your personal property, subtract your street number, multiply by your wife's height, and divide by your telephone number. If you have a child in the family, you subtract $200.00 from your income, add your collar size, add the child's age, multiply by your waist measure, subtract the amount of funds you have given to the church in the past year, and then divide by the number of your automobile license. If there is a second child you deduct $400.00 from your income tax, add the weight and age of the child, and divide by the date of your birth, multiply by the size of your hat, and subtract the weight of your mother-in-law. After you have it all figured out you won't have to pay any tax of any nature, for they will have you in the booby hatch and strapped down.

"Advice to Vacationists. Take the children to the country with you--this will keep you from becoming lonesome. Hey. Help. Help. Splash. August Hutaf. P.C.K. 1908." One in a series of humorous "Advice to Vacationists" postcards by illustrator August Hutaf (1874-1942). For more of his work, see my other Hutaf postcards .

"No. ________. Amount ________. Name ________. Open a bank account of your own and watch it grow. Spend less than you get. The Guardian Trust Co. of York, Pa." A bank envelope with some practical advice.

Scary instructions for surviving an atomic bomb blast that were distributed to residents of Lawn , Pennsylvania, in the 1950s. Fire & Air Raid Signals for Lawn and Vicinity Fire: 1 sharp blast for 4 minutes. Air Raid Test Alert: 3 short sharp blasts (not used in case of actual road). Air Raid Alert: 3-minute continuous fluctuating blasts. All Clear: 3 1-minute blasts at 2-minute intervals. 6 Survival Secrets for "A" Bombing 1. Try to get shielded. If you have time, get down in basement or subway. If out-of-doors, seek shelter alongside a building. 2. Drop flat on ground or floor. To keep from being tossed about and to lessen the chance of being struck by falling and flying objects. 3. Bury your face in your arms. To protect your face from flash burns. 4. Don't rush outside after a bombing. Wait at least 1 hour for radiation to die down. 5. Avoid food or water in open containers. To avoid radioactive poisoning, stick to canned or bottled food. 6. Don't start rumors. A single rumor might touch off a panic that could cause human casualties. Compliments of Harold's Insurance Agency. Complete insurance service. Campbelltown, Pa. Harold S. Patrick, agent.

"Buy the 'Empire' Wringer. Uncle Sam--'Take my advice, and if you want a surplus use the Empire well.'"

"The Procrastinator's Hereafter. Take a friend's advice: Never put off till tomorrow what you can do today--Answer that letter." Sign: "Bottomless Pit Drop In." Pity the poor procrastinator who doesn't answer his letters! This pathetic fellow obviously failed to keep up with his correspondence while he was alive, and now in the "hereafter" the devil is looking over his shoulder to make sure he responds on time--and for all time! In order to avoid falling into the fiery "Bottomless Pit" below, the procrastinator is precariously perched on an endless roll of paper as he scribbles out his message. The last few lines he's written on the paper suggest that he's trying to explain away his current predicament: "...in my new home. Although everything is up to sample, I'm not stuck on the place but circumstances over which I have no control impel me to stick...." -------- Reverse of postcard: Postmarked: "Hartford, Conn., Aug. 25, 1912." Addressed to: "Mr. W. J. Ross, 131 River St., N. Adams, Mass." Handwritten message: "Dear Will: What do you think of this for a card? I don't hear from Flora very often. I'm working and not having much fun either--just existing. Not as tired as when I came here. Hastily, Cora."