dolores666's photos with the keyword: GeneralElection2015

NB. This is not a Poisson d’Avril, honest. It’s the last of the Alternative Electoral Campaign UK 2015 introducing: The Rosie & Zippy Mellow Metal Combo. Run by Rosie, faux-young Shoggoth and Zippy Stardust, MiGo elder. Plus camp followers: BoomBoom, Rosie’s pseudo twin, Bryan, the Trouble Teddy and Leah, the Bubbly Demonette. Please do not vote for them. They really are not interested in power, hegemony, world domination, exceptionalism, crapitalism, demockracy, ideological export games, paranoid doctrines, hysterical fairy-tales or feeble-minded market theories. They’ve only come along because some of their friends are running. Were they to run, however, they would guarantee cost-free, hassle-free, painless, efficient and durable MiGo Molecular Reshuffle to anybody who wanted it, thus ditching, once and for all, the vexed question of the NHS; plus free ice cream, Smarties, teddy bears and fresh flowers, of course. Having said that, they’ve pledge themselves to work with whichever party wins the election, even if it’s the Shub-Niggurath (with whom the Shoggies have …history), in the areas of health, entertainment and culture & sport. The MiGo will look after the public health and the Shoggies have volunteered to run free for all educational workshops on subjects such as Disrespecting Authority, Guilt-Free Reasoning, Understanding the Paranoid Mind, etc. and organize equally free and accessible to all art events ranging from Bach recitals to short morality plays of their own devising such as The Defenestration of Ben Bernanke. Also training in groovy novel sports, like Banksters Tar & Feathering, Politicians Tossing, Facebook Sabotage (Beginners, Intermediate and Black Belt) and Monsanto CEOs Nipping. Electoral slogan: Let's go to the pub instead, shall we?

That’s it, chaps. One more poster and we’re done. Here we are introducing to you and proposing as candidates for the General Election 2015, UK (a junior branch of Transatlantic Exceptionalities Inc.): Spartacist League 0.2 Gibbets, Imogen and Rudolph, renegade Uncouth Larvae, lately of the Final Void. They run an ideology-free shindig. They pledge free Belgian chocolate, free drinks, free drugs and free high-cholesterol takeaways for everybody. A full restoration of a universal, free, and Big Pharma-free NHS to be implemented forthwith. They are also quite keen on letting every Tom, Dick, Harry and Johnny Foreigner into the country because a) It's a good prophylactic against inbreeding and b) It SO irritates Nigel Farrago and the Daily Mail. Loosely aligned to: Emiliano "The Mexican" McFluff, of the Rosa Luxemburg Lives! Conventicle Zorro the WonderDog, of the Free Bones & Biscuits Party Edwina the Singing Chicken, of the Loopy Fringe Chamber Ensemble Tampopo, the Educated Whale, of the Sleeping with Fishes Cabal. Their motto is: Life is too short and ideologies are for peasants. Eat, drink, smoke yourself silly and be merry for tomorrow... who gives a toss? Carpe diem, mate, the party’s on us!

Introducing the as-yet undecided-but-just-in-case candidates for the In a Permanent State of Flux Party: The Hounds of Tindalos. Curves keep them away from our worlds and angles let them in. They are older than anything you care to mention or even imagine. They beat Azathoth by a long chalk in the chaos and mayhem league tables. If they could be bothered to boast, they’d boast they can offer the nation really new angles on your common or garden Nietzschean outlook. They claim, when they remember to claim anything at all, that their ice cream is, verily, yea! something else; truly sinful stuff. Right now they still haven’t quite made up their scatty minds as to whether they want to compete or not. They say they are far too busy having and rearing new puppies, looking for crinkly spaces, or linear chunks of time, so they can invade our Reality and give everybody a time they’ll never forget. And generally behaving like the yahoos they are, although they don’t put it quite so bluntly. I want them to run because I have only four candidates and 4 is a bit of a boring number. I pointed out to the fuzzy canines that five is a much more dynamic and disruptive number. They did not react in the least to the word dynamic; they just sat there looking for imaginary fleas (no parasite is stupid enough to invade these creatures), scratching non-existent scabs and looking vacant. At the word “disruptive”, however, their ears pricked up, their tails started going like the clappers and they began salivating in a manner that would have made Pavlov roll his eyes with delight. So they might enter the race after all, which is why I made them a poster of sorts. And yes, they are not the most endorsable of candidates, but then again neither is Nigel Farrage, now, is he?

That's it, beautiful people, the kosher campaigning stars here. Meet your first candidate. Coalition for Real Chaos (Final Void Splinter) Shub-Niggurath, The Black Goat of the Woods with a Thousand Young, a single mother of far too many Young, each and every one a nogoodnik, and two monstrosities she disowned and disinherited eons ago. In a perennial strop herself, she can offer the nation nothing but blood, pain and tears. She thinks that if that did for Churchill she can't see why it shouldn't do for her. She promises, however, special dispensations from blood, pain etc. to anyone (excepting Karl Rove et al) willing to babysit on regular basis. Also, she brings her own cabinet, civil service and armed forces, that is, her Thousand Young, aka the Shub-Niggureths, as part of the deal. She's all for nepotism because she is a great believer in family values. She also promises to preserve a free NHS so that the blood, pain, etc. can be somewhat mitigated. Under her monstrous management you will suffer horribly but if it’s any consolation, so will Henry Kissinger, Warren Buffet and they of that ilk, for whom she has a very special kind of affliction in mind. PS. I DID say I intended to use the "Cthulhu for President" concept, didn't I? Well, I do keep my promises, too, like the ineffable Shubby.